Where is your energy going? Is it on what matters most?


Hey Beautiful Souls!

I thought of something the other day that triggered a Facebook post, but it’s an idea I want to dig into a bit deeper.

It was triggered by other people in my life, but as it often is I then realize “Crap” I am totally doing this too but it shows up a bit differently for me. (As it often is when we are frustrated by something or someone!)

What people and things are you giving your best to while saving the “left overs” for the most important people (including yourself)

The thing is I believe that 99% of the time we are totally unaware of this behavior, these actions at first. It just sort of seems that’s “how it’s done”. But is this really how we want to do things? This idea can be applied to so many areas of our lives.

Please understand me when I say that often the things and people we are giving to are not bad at all. But they happen to be where we are putting so much of ourselves into and when we really become aware of it and examine it a bit we may realize that this behavior is having a negative  effect on our life in various ways to our relationships, finances, energy etc. It’s not about blaming the other people or the circumstances either. It’s about taking ownership of what level of yourself you are putting into these things/people.

Being aware of it is step one to shifting it, you can’t shift what you don’t see or are willing to look at. Think of it like this, there is a pile of stuff that could make you fall, but if you don’t know it’s there you can’t step over it and consciously avoid or make your way through it.

I will give you a few examples that you might be familiar with: ( I say You, but several of these have shown up again and again in my life)

-You talk (or text etc.) with someone for hours, really wanting to help support them in their difficult time (but you do this over and over and it’s clear there is a bigger part of them that appears to be more committed to the drama then the shift) But when your spouse, child, family calls you don’t have time to talk or are too drained to listen/talk.  Or you don’t feel like you don’t have the time to do the things that are nourishing to you.

-You spend money on food that feeds you but does not really taste all that good or nourish you, but you don’t put any aside for healthy groceries or even that yummy but pricier meal out that you would actually like way more!

-You spend hours after that job you don’t love spaced out essentially on email and the vortex (also referred to as the internet!) But then you complain that you don’t have enough time to… (read, create, work on your passion business the list goes on)

-All your energy goes into essentially putting on a front in a job or situation that you don’t adore but for now need, even when you are not there you feel drained and complain. You say if I just had__ I would then be able to (fill in the blank, really live, build that business, get healthy, be worthy etc.) Instead of using that time to realize how this situation might support what you seek, and looking at the little things you can control and ways you can show up with more authenticity.

A few Questions to get you started on shifting this:

Question one, what is most important to you? Who, what values, things, activities etc.? Question 2 is this where you are putting your best self into, The most energy into?

Honestly this is a very layered process as far as I can see but it hast to start somewhere right? It’s not likely that just asking that question will make everything fall into alignment like magic, but it will make you more aware. And in that awareness you have the option, the chance to choose differently. And the beautiful thing is that each time we can choose again (and again and again!)

This is something I commit to imperfectly shifting in my life, even tiny steps at a time. Because I want to put the best of me into what matters most!

Here is to living Inspired, Creative and Empowered



2 responses to “Where is your energy going? Is it on what matters most?

  1. Oh my gosh: “It was triggered by other people in my life, but as it often is I then realize “Crap” I am totally doing this too but it shows up a bit differently for me. (As it often is when we are frustrated by something or someone!)”

    I don’t know last time I saw truer words. I do that all the time.

    The two questions you posed just went in my journal, determinately something to work on and dive into a bit. I know I could always give more to my daughter, but what cost to my personal self and time. Gah, this crap’s hard. hah.

    As always, thank you for sharing.

    • Katie,

      Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting. SO glad it resonated with you.(And freaking annoying when we realize that isn’t it?!) I think it’s important for you to fill yourself first, that is how you will have the fuel to be able to give to your daughter from a more whole place, not one of feeling depleted. (Think Oxygen mask on a plane you put yours on first so you are around to help others!) Don’t beat yourself up, just be open to seeing where you might be giving your attention to something that really does not fuel you but distracts or numbs you. xo

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